Where Are the Clowns
Brenda Race

Where Are The Clowns?
Who Said There Would Be Golden Years?
Mine Seem to Be Filled with Lots of Fears.
Where Are the Clowns?
Please Send in the Clowns.

I've Lost My Shoes, Where Are They?
Someone Will Surely Have to Pay.
I Find Things Tucked in the Weirdest Spots.
Little Things in Little Slots.

The People about Me Say They Don't Know.
Always, Asking Me Where Are You Going to Go?
"Let Me Help You" I'm Not a Child!
They Tend to Treat Me as If I Were Wild.

I Know That Face but I've Lost the Name.
I'll Just Cover it up like I'm Playing a Game!
Where Are the Clowns?
Please Send in the Clowns.

Why Do They Feel I Need to Change?
And Run Water over Me as if I have the Mange.
Don't They Know it Is Safer this Way.
Just Let Me Wear These Clothes Day after Day!

Why Am I Here. I Really Don't See.
I Don't Know These People Surrounding Me.
Where Is My Home, My Children and Spouse?
And Just Whose Is this Strange House?

They Tell Me I Live Here but I Know it isn't so
I Only Want to Be Able to Go.
Surly this must Be a Bad Dream I Am In.
Tell Me Please If it Will End and Just When.

Send in the Clowns, Please Send Them In.
Surely this Has to Be a Dream
It Wasn't a Part of My Big Scheme
I Need Someone to Tell Me That It's Okay
That Life Will Not Go on this Way

Wake Me up and Tell Me it Isn't So
I Have People to See and Miles to Go
I Know I Am Needed by Someone Somewhere,
I Don't Want Them to Think I Really
Don't Care.
Please Send in the Clowns

Copyright © 1998 Brenda Race
Used with permission of the author.

Brenda was caregiver to her mother for a year
until her mother was placed in a nursing home in
December 1998. She continued to visit her mother
regularly and to share hours with her until her
mothers death in December 1999. Brenda has posted
her beautiful poetry at A Window on My Mind
and it can be found in Insights at Alzheimer's
as well as at her own site,
Poems, Prayers and Promises.

Email Brenda at: brace47@charter.net

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