My life revolved in circles, spinning round and round
I'd never quite accepted the goodness that I'd found
Until the day my mother could no longer yet rely
Upon herself in all things - and needed me to try

To give my life in service - become her memory
Trust in me for guidance and always, honesty ---
My mother was transformed in so many different ways
She became, to me, an anchor when storms of life would break

She held fast in believing - no matter what life held
Regardless of the hardship - She knew, one day, she'd dwell
Among the Land Eternal - Where spirits are all free
But for the time being - her human strength was me...

I found the one I'd longed for nearly all my natural life
The mother that I'd needed - who loved me without strife
Whose slender hands held tightly to what little I could give
Whose thoughts were ever centered in ways to help ME live

Despite, she knew, the outcome that her own life was to end
She resolved to be my mother, my companion, my best friend
To ever be so grateful for anything I did
Not be the one who raised me when I was just a kid ...

But be someone I'd cherish and honor all my days
Teach me important lessons by exemplifying ways
Of Christ living within her - A true example, be
Of one who'd found true freedom without ever being free....

Over time, I found not only was she a different one
But I, too, had awakened - New life, in me, begun
I noticed as she faded in body and in mind
Her spirit just grew brighter - God's Love, within her, shined

She taught me by example -God's grace is our great gift
Each loss she bore in silence - Grateful for what was left
She did not spend her time in grumbling, complaining in her bed
But spent, instead, her hours counting blessings she still had....

Completely changed my nature - I'll never be the same
Nor would I ever want to go back the way I came ....
Of all that God has given - These truths I've learned through tears
Would never been accomplished .....
Without those last four years.........

© 1999 Dorothy Womack

Copyright © 1998 Dorothy Womack
Used with permission of the author.

I know exactly what Dorothy is expressing in this poem,
for I feel that way as well. I'm so grateful for my year.
with my mother and for how I have eventually changed since,
because I was her caregiver. Like Dorothy, I would not
do it differently if I could go back, nor do I want to go
back to what I was before all the lessons I learned through
caregiving.
Dorothy's book Passage into Paradise is on her
website at: http://www.geocities.com/womack47/passage.html
and now is available from iUniverse as well, along with Alzheimer's Angels,
her book of poems, and three other books (see below).
Dorothy is a writer for http://www.caregiver.com/
and her articles can also be found in the
Alzheimer's Articles section of A Year to Remember.
Email Dorothy at: womack47@charter.net
You can find all of Dorothy's books by clicking on the covers below: